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Saturday, November 14, 2009,
It's kinda ridiculous how addicted I am to facebook. I said I wouldn't go on for this month, but I still find myself going on everyday (although, it's only to check club meeting info and event info). I've become so dependent on my computer and on the internet... On another note, here's what I'm thankful for this week :) 1. Sleep. I used to only get 3-4 hours of sleep everyday on school days and like 7-10 hours on weekends. Crazy. I probably dealt some pretty serious damage to my body that I might not be able to reverse. I mean, I notice it even now, when I look in the mirror and see the bags under my eyes. Thankfully, I've been getting 6 hours of sleep on average during school days, since I actually start homework before 10 now. I can really see how it's impacting me too. I feel more awake and more energized during school, and I'm not as moody anymore. 2. Doubts. Without them, I would be way too careless. 3. Exercise. My personal favorite stress reliever :)
9:39 PM
Sunday, November 1, 2009,
"There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you." -David Burns
9:33 PM
Saturday, October 31, 2009,
Happy Halloween! :) What I'm grateful for this week: 1. chocolate. Oh goodness, what would I do without these two guilty pleasures? Whenever I'm feeling down, I immediately crave chocolate or something sweet. I guess it helps that I don't have to worry about packing on 10 pounds from eating. Chocolate really is a lifesaver for me though. As stupid as it may sound, if I wasn't able to eat sweets every now and then, I'd be much more moody and irritated. Chocolate melts in your mouth and just envelops you in that sweet, warm sensation. Chocolate reminds me that not everything in life sucks (which is what I'm usually thinking when I crave chocolate). 2. rain. Have you ever stood outside in the pouring rain and just reflected for a bit? It's such an amazing experience. Sometimes I despise the rain because it puts me in a gloomy mood and makes me sleep in class, but I think that's actually a good thing (excluding the sleeping in class part, haha). I try so hard to keep up that optimistic attitude and smile I'm known for; and as the president of Club Smile, it's my responsibility to stay as optimistic as possible, so that I don't become the biggest hypocrite ever and disappoint my club members. But those rainy days provide such a nice moment for me to be depressed and squeeze any tears I've held back. I don't feel like my sorrows or sins are washed away when I stand in the rain; I feel like they're being concealed as I let them flow out of my mouth, my eyes, my body. The rain shrouds me and gives me an opportunity to release every negative emotion into a puddle on the ground. After I calm down, I can just step in that puddle, which is what obstacles really are; they're just negligible puddles. 3. shoujo. Shoujo is a type of manga mainly focused on a female audience; its American equivalent would be a romance novel. As corny as they are, I absolutely adore shoujo manga/anime. I'm probably going on a dork-fest rant here, but I seriously feel so much passion for this subject. Shoujo is unrealistic, I'll admit that. I mean, when does a normal, anti-social girl ever manage to capture the heart of the most seemingly perfect boy in existence? Very, very rarely or not at all in real life. But shoujo gives me so much hope and assurance. I fall in love with the plot line and couple way too often. They're so optimistic; love always conquers in the end, and everyone lives happily ever after. What's absolutely amazing is knowing that one day, you'll find your soul mate, your zettai kareshi. Despite the fact that he/she has flaws and that you might argue with him/her, true love pulls through in the end and gives you the strength and will to look over those setbacks and appreciate the assets.
10:11 PM
Saturday, October 24, 2009,
So since I never, ever update this blog, I figure I would just type up what I write in what I call my "gratitude journal." I read an article in Reader's Digest about how being grateful can make you significantly more happy over time. Life is somewhat bleak and hard for me at the moment, and a lot of times, I forget that I am so blessed to have so much to be thankful for. So every week, I will update this blog with a list of things I am grateful for. Week 1: 1. David Park. He really slaps me into shape when I need it, when I need to be reminded that I have responsibilities I can't shirk off just because I had one off day. He speaks the truth that others are afraid to tell me (in fear of hurting my feelings, maybe?). Sometimes you need a wake-up call like that. 2. The sun. Sometimes I really forget how beautiful and warm the sun is. I love being an office aid; I have a lot more chances to walk outside and enjoy the weather. The sun's warmth engulfs me whenever I step outside when the weather is beautiful. The sun really brings light into my life, and life to all organisms on Earth. 3. Love. I'd like to believe I'm in love. I might actually be, but there's also that huge chance that I'm not, and that I'm letting my emotions and hormones get the best of me. But for now, I'd like to be grateful for the "love" I feel now. I am so grateful for all the moments I've had with Louis so far. My heart still aches knowing that I can't hug him or lay in his arms anytime I want, but I also feel empowered and determined to give it my all. It's not even his love I'm grateful for; love in general is just a great thing. Too often, I think we forget about how essential love is and how important it is to express it- through words, through actions, through laughter. 4. School. Where would I go without the education I get now? I'm so blessed to be able to go to a school like Northview. True, it's almost ridiculous how competitive students are and I do have a love/hate relationship with my classes, but I also realized that there are so many other people in the world who don't even get the chance to try school food, to fight to reach a locker, to stand in the bleachers booing the freshmen and juniors. This education that stresses me out and makes me want to punch something is opening up so many opportunities for me. 5. Music. It does honestly sadden me how music seems to be going downhill. A lot of songs have lyrics that just no longer have any significant meaning behind them ("LOL smiley face," "Why you so obsessed with me?" "You're a jerk"). But some songs still manage to pull through, and I am grateful for that. There are enough songs about sex, breakups, and sadness. Thank God for the fact that I can choose what I listen to. And I thank God for allowing me to be able to hear at all.
1:48 PM
Wednesday, July 15, 2009,
I keep seeing this in a bunch of different magazines, where people use 6 words to describe something. I thought I'd try it myself :) Thank you all for putting up with me all these times :) Shuo You make me smile too easily :) Page I'll never forget everything you gave! Simon Drive carefully & visit next year; bye :( Janet Flew away (literally); miss you greatly Karen Truly selfless; sun during rainy days Ed Stop cheating, noob, but keep rapping ;) Monique Gangsta; he will do, I suppose x) Jenny For the memories and lessons, thanks Dong Don't make me a paranoid mom =O=;; Andy I hope those "ok"s become "awesome"s :) Alex So stubborn, but appreciate the frankness Rudi Miss you; we never hung out :( Christy Much appreciation; sorry for hurtful moments Stephen Beat- amazing overall, deserves better, love :) Peter No more cookies, please; hurry back Dennis Your smiles are contagious, high five! Umeki Always making me smile and laugh :D Dannielle Freaking me out; it's your job XD Vish Closet Hannah Montana lover, admit it >:) Sara Rumors mean nothing; nice, fun, courageous Christina Amazingly optimistic; Prince Charming is lucky
7:29 PM
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